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Machete On Pirates – God Switched Off His Phone

Sinethemba Makonco

May 23, 2026

Orbit College assistant coach Kabelo Machete has teasingly stated “God is from North West” ahead for their big game against Orlando Pirates today.

Orbit will play an R80 million clash, as they aim to survive from automatic relegation. After only collecting six wins in 29 league games, the North West side has struggled and only won two games in 2026.

But Machete expressed his confidence, saying Pirates were already denied last week when people were ready to celebrate, so maybe this week he will support Orbit and sidestep the Buccaneers again.

“Last week at Orlando, a packed Orlando, champagnes were out. 
The braai stands were umlilo uvuthile and uh, God decided to switch off the phone. And it was on mute, people could not get [hold] of God,” Machete told the media.

“So maybe tomorrow, God decides to answer the Orbit College call. We don’t know but every day that you wake up, it’s a gift, you know? So, God, did not turn his back on us, or with College.

“We’re going through lessons as new kids on the block. So all the lessons will take them tomorrow.

“I mean, like I said earlier, that we do it the way, go to Amstel Arena and lost to Pirates by one goal to zero. So tomorrow, they are under pressure.

“We are fighting for our lives, but are you guaranteed to get a second of life? I mean, second live, you know, no one knows, so tomorrow God is from Northwest, my friend.

“He’s from Northwest, and he came with us to Mpumalanga, you know. So if the Premier League allowed us to be here, then which means God is here in Mpumalanga.“